If Your Child Is a Victim

Your first task when sexual abuse is disclosed is to separate the natural reactions to overwhelmingly bad news from disbelief of your child. Your child (or children) needs to know that you believe him / her and will support him / her. The feeling that you'll wake up soon and find out it was all a bad dream is called denial. It provides only brief protection from the frustration, misery, horror, and isolation that may follow.

Stop for a moment and review what went through your head as you learned your child had been sexually abused, and what you said to your child. Is there anything that you want to change now? If you hesitate before acting, your child may not understand why. It is important for you to talk about this with your child.

Children who have someone understanding and supporting them suffer fewer ill effects than do children without help. Your role as a parent is to support your child in recovery providing reassurance, safety, and love. You must also make decisions about medical care, legal proceedings and counseling. Children's believe that they are the cause of everything including their own abuse. They need reassurance that they didn't cause your anger, tears, and sadness.